Vegas: Thunder Down Under

thunder

¬†I’m going to VEGAS!!! Check that off my bucket list!

Yes, I will be going to the Thunder Down Under show. WHAT? My friend wants to see them. I’m being a good friend and supporting her adventure. ūüėČ

I won’t be keeping what happens in Vegas in Vegas. More after I return from Sin City.

Chiropractic Care

chiropractor

Chiropractic care should be included as a primary care coverage on health insurance along with acupuncture. It makes me feel so wonderful and I really think it aids in overall better health.

I fell on my booty on Friday night. A loose dog came running up to my dogs and mine went nuts. Next thing, I knew I was landing tush first on blacktop.

Yeah, I knew I was going to be in some pain and my chiropractor is not open on the weekends, however, I found out today he does do emergency adjustments after hours.

Anyway, Saturday, I was in pain. Alcohol helped numb it..lol. I went to a paint and sip so alcohol was a must and I’d already paid for the class, plus it was a tribute to Prince so I wasn’t missing the class.

Today, I saw my chiropractor and I feel like 20 again instead of like 90…lol.

Pain: Let Me Explain…

pain

I re-read my blogs over and over, well, I try to. Mainly, I re-read them to catch errors, because I write them when I’m so freakin tired that I know I can babble on and make no sense…LOL.

Well, I re-read my blog Moving On and I feel I need to add this blog. I stand by what I wrote in it, but I want to say that the guy I was dating was a really nice guy, a southern gentleman and he has a lot of good qualities as does my ex husband. Despite what I write about our relationship and how I felt or what happen in the relationships, the pain I express may make the guys sound like ogres, but their not. Some of their actions may be unattractive, but as a whole they are not terrible men.

I’ve been with terrible men and know that my ex and the guy I was dating are not terrible. Sure, they have flaws. Everyone has flaws. It was these flaws that caused things to end between us. The flaws that the guy I was dating and my ex¬†have are not something I hold against him. The guy I was dating, I understand why he did the things he did, why he has the feelings he has about his marriage, why he pulled away and the baggage he has from his marriage. This understanding makes me forgive him.

Yes, I have pain from things not working out with the guy I was dating, but this is what happens when a relationship doesn’t workout. The pain does not equal a chip on my shoulder or wanting to get back at him, like, his ex treats pain.

I’m just trying to move on and express my feelings. This is one way to help me to move on.

Cookies – Life Lesson: Number Twenty

cookies

Washing a cookie off, this was probably not the best solution to getting the ranch dressing off my cookie…LOL.

It did get the ranch dressing off my cookie and it still tastes good. However, the cookie is very soggy.

I don’t know what I was thinking when I put the cookie under water to get the ranch dressing off it.

Girl Power: Moving On…continued

know-your-self-worth

I guess I got over my writer’s block…lol.

This goes with my previous post Moving On and with The Seed’s for Life blog, A Letter to Anyone Who Seeks a Fulfilling Relationship. The failed relationship with the guy I was dating I am, also, guilty of it failing.

Ladies, we were either not taught or forgot the power we behold as women. And, we forget or have no self-worth. I was married for so long that I forgot my self-worth and the power I behold in dealing with a man.

We, as women, have all the control from the beginning of a relationship how a man is going to respect us. We decide when it’s time to meet the guy. During the date, we decide how this guy is going to respect us by what we allow him to do. If he is not the gentleman we seek or has the qualities we want, we decide if we want to continue the date.¬†We decide if we want to go on a second date. We decide if we want to kiss the guy at the end of the date. We decide how far we let the guy go sexually. We set the boundaries to what is acceptable behavior, acceptable conversation and how men are going to respect us.

After being married for so long and not dating, I was a bit rusty at the dating game, but I picked up on things quick after my failed first time out in the field.

But during my first attempt at dating, I made some mistakes that The Seed’s for Life blog, A Letter to Anyone Who Seeks a Fulfilling Relationship¬†blog points out.¬†One, I became secure in my insecurities. My ex complained about everything about me and I let that affect me where I thought I was flawed. Who would want this flawed person that has so much baggage? Two, being a settler, yes, I was okay with being single, because I was afraid to let someone into my imperfect world. Three, Being someone that isn’t me, I kept quiet about things that bothered me when I was dating this guy, because of my ex telling me how negative, how opinionated, and how hostile I was.

What I know now, I let my ex’s complaining affect my self-worth and I forgot about the Great parts of me. After dating this guy, I realized it’s okay that I’m flawed and have baggage. I just need to find the right guy, who doesn’t criticize my flaws and baggage, but encourages and supports me. Taking the plunge and dating, I’m not afraid anymore to let someone into my imperfect world, because their world may be just as imperfect as mine. Lastly, from now on, I’m just going to be me and if the guy can’t handle it, well, the door swings both ways and there will be a guy out there that can deal with the DIVA me and my softer side.

So Ladies remember the Power within you, be yourself and know your self-worth.

Relationships: What I Want

queen

After my divorce and dating a guy, I decided I would only be with a guy if I was totally happy and he treated me like his Queen. I’ve spent most of my life unhappy and I sure as hell am not going to spend the rest of it miserable.

What I  want in my next marriage:

  1. Respect
  2. Honesty
  3. Trust, I can trust them and they trust me completely
  4. Faithful
  5. Love
  6. I’m the most important person in my man’s life
  7. Total Gentleman
  8. Great communication  (not constant arguing)
  9. Emotional support
  10. Understanding about who I am and able to put themselves in my shoes
  11. Affection and not just getting it in the bedroom
  12. No judgment
  13. Less criticism
  14. Productive Encouragement
  15. My partner is my best friend
  16. Happiness
  17. Views and treats me as his Queen
  18. If I give 100%, I expect the same from my partner
  19. Commitment and devotion
  20. Happily ever after forever with my King

Am I wanting a fairy tale? No, I know that marriage has its bumps and pains, but I want someone, who is going to love me, keep treating me like his Queen and everything else I listed when the shit gets rough in the marriage.

Moving On…

Heart-Balloon-Color-Corrected

I decided a few weeks ago to move on and let go of hoping this guy I was dating would want to be with me. I kept quiet about the break-up for a long time, because I was respecting his privacy, but now, I figure he doesn’t give a shit about me and he’s not going to read this post so what does it matter if I talk about my feelings.

He was the first guy I dated after my divorce and we clicked the first time we met. There was so much chemistry and I really liked him. He told me he wanted to be in a relationship with me and that he experienced the same chemistry between us, too.

But, when it came closer to him being transferred to Texas, I felt him pulling away. His attitude towards me changed and his behavior became less “into” me. After he was in Texas, I asked him if he wanted to stop seeing each other, because I could tell he was pulling away from me. He said to me that I was sabotaging the relationship. Thinking back about how he behaved, I feel he was the sabotager and wanted me to end things.

We were only together for four months, but I figured someone, who is 46 would have his shit together and know what he wants. But I was wrong. He behaved like the guys I encountered in my twenties and I think he was worse, because he was damaged from his previous marriage. He was scorned and everything I did only reminded him of his ex-wife, so I was damned if I did and damned if I didn’t. I noticed his lack of trust and his questioning of things that sent red flags my way, but I didn’t confront him about it since we hadn’t known each other very long.

Despite my feelings for him, it was obvious that¬†he was not ready for a relationship, because he hadn’t worked out all his baggage from his bad marriage. He wasn’t even aware of the fact that he needed to work that shit out. Crazy thing is, I was willing to work through his baggage with him, because I understood his pain.

Anyway, I keep telling myself to let him go and that he doesn’t give a shit about me. If he did he would be calling or texting me like he did when we met. I tell myself this everyday.

For a week now, I have been trying to get back in the game of dating. I’m talking to a couple guys, but my heart is half in it. There’s one guy I’m interested in, but like I said my heart is half in it and I keep thinking about the guy I was seeing, who doesn’t care about or deserve¬†my time, my thoughts or my heart anymore.

Writer’s Block

snoopythinking

For several days, I haven’t been able to come up with something to blog about. I’m not sure what’s causing the block. I’m sure all of you have experienced this. Maybe writing this something will pop into my head and the creativity will come back.