Often, I’m in my head thinking about life and what has happened, figuring out what I’m supposed to understand and if I’m at a crossroads.
I think all of us experience moments in life where we need to stop, think and figure out the moment we find ourselves in.
Many times I’ve experiened these moments. Some were not so big and others were life changing. But I learned something from each one.
When my dad was at the end stages of his cancer a part of me knew I was in a life moment. But, I let my fears and the conflict between my father and me get in the way of embracing that moment. I never told my dad I loved him and I didn’t try to resolve the conflict between us before he died. And, I regretted this.
I was in school when my mom found out she had lung cancer. Another life moment. These life moments don’t always happen at convenient times nor at times when we feel ready for them. They make their appearance and we can embrace them or ignore them.
Also, my ex and I were in Disney World on our honeymoon when I got the call my mother was in the Emergency room and she had cancer. We packed our bags and flew to Iowa.
As I sat there in the hospital with mom, a feeling came over me and I knew my time with her was going to end soon. So, I didn’t go back to graduate school, stayed in Iowa and I took care of her.
I spent what time my mother had left with her and made sure I had no regrets. I shared thoughts and feelings about my life with her, I tried to be there for her and I shared her last life moments with my mother.
When she died I had no regrets, but life memories that would help me later in life.
I find myself in another life moment as I write this. From what I’ve learned from past life moments, I know to just embrace this moment with no fear amd see where it takes me.