I read Savingshards blog, Better Alone. Or Not. It made me think about my marriage and ex. There were moments I wondered if I shouldn’t have left then I remember how I feel when I’m around my ex.
This past Monday my ex and I took our pups hiking. We can do things together and not kill each other…LOL. However, we get on each other’s nerves every time we are together. Why? Because, all the things that annoyed us about each other really aggravate us now that we are not married. Ironically, during the hike, we talked about how we piss each other off.
Some of our friends wonder how we can be civil to one another and be friends. We get along, because we choose to be this way. Getting along, this does not equal that we are BFFs. Also, I don’t feel it’s necessary to be a Bitch or mean to my ex. I think that behavior is juvenile and I’d rather be positive when there’s so much negative in the world.
During the hike, my ex asked me if I was seeing anyone. I told him I hadn’t found anyone that had the qualities I’m looking for. My ex told me I shouldn’t be so picky and that guys, who have been married and older, there are only a few that want to get married, again.
Being on my own, I’ve realized that it’s better to be alone than be unhappy and married. We loved each other, but I was married to someone, who didn’t give me the respect I wanted, who wasn’t attentive to my needs, who didn’t appreciate me and who didn’t know how to support me emotionally.
I’d rather be alone than with some guy, who I’m not in love with, who disrespects me and who I’m miserable with more than I’m happy. I’m not going to be with any guy just to be with someone.
The next guy I marry he will have all the qualities I’m looking for. I won’t lie to myself and say he’ll change. Every guy, I meet I’ll see them for who they are and not what I hope they will change into. I won’t settle.
I choose Happiness over having a Man in my life.
Being alone is not so bad. I’m content and happy being with Me, Myself and I.